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“One thing I know/ This pain will go.” –Suzanne Vega

 

Finding Comfort in Your Clothes After Heartbreak:

 

Fashion + Self-Love Party, Day 6.
Guest post by Josie Mills from Open Mind Fashion (OMF).

Surviving the break-up: Day 1

I kissed a few frogs on the path to meeting my prince, my husband. And along the way, some left me green and croaking for a while. In those tough times, I would become even more aware of the textures & qualities of my clothes–my clothes became a form of solace, and dressing up would help me get through the next day even though I wanted to die.

I would often turn to corduroy for solace, in particular, an oversized navy shirt. I’d study the way my skin looked against this rough fabric, the pureness of its dark color against the light of my skin. I’d pull the shirt around me like a cape and wait out the night.

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Big, Black, Oversized Sweatshirt from H&M.

A big sweatshirt, a blanket scarf, a cashmere poncho–soft, oversized clothes might help comfort you through grief. 

Returning to the land of the living:

In the morning, the world insisting that I pick myself up and go to work, I’d don a crisp white shirt–white always fresh, always a new start.

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I’d make lists of all the things I liked about myself, about my life–from my kitty purring on my chest to listening to my favorite songs, to walking in the park through crunchy leaves.

I’d go to the movies by myself every Sunday afternoon back then, escape for a couple hours into someone else’s make-believe existence. A married woman said to me then: “When you meet the right person, they’ll like the same movies you do.”

I can find another you in a minute:

After a while, I might start to feel angry instead of sad, anger always a stronger emotion, & then there were lots of options: torn jeans, beat-up tees, and heavy boots.

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Angry, power-infusing clothing suggestions: an army jacket, Doc Martens, fishnet tights, destroyed jeans.
Walk with purpose, look as tough as you feel.

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Daring, Edgy Army Jacket from Urban Outfitters.

Making it through to the other side:

If I could make it past the anger, I was about ready to come out of hiding. They say to “take care of yourself,” which sometimes translates into buying yourself something new–ideally the trendiest, hottest outfit possible to say “I’m moving forward. I’m part of the new; goodbye, old.”

“I’m moving forward. 

I’m part of the new; goodbye, old.”

Ask the married when they spent the most on their clothes, and they’ll tell you it was either when they got a new job or when they were dating. Looking good on the outside really can help you feel better on the inside. It’s not so much the clothes as the confidence they help restore. 
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Trendy, Sweet, Feminine, Arm Tie Sweater from Zara.

 A long sheer dress, a tie-sleeve sweater–Topshop and Zara are always on the front of the trends, and their clothes are affordable. 

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Trendy, Bold, Feminine, Black Sheer Top from Zara.

I’ve been green & I’ve been blue. But in the end, I found someone who likes to go to the movies with me. He likes action films and violence, but he also appreciates a good comedy, suspense, foreign film, or drama. I don’t think he cares much what I’m wearing, but he tells me I look nice every day.

–Guest post by Josie Mills.
Josie writes the blog Open Mind Fashion (OMF)
Follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram

What have you worn to survive a break-up?

Tell us in the comments!

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